How to Ask a Roommate to Move Out

It's one of the most awkward conversations you can have, but delaying it only makes it worse. Here is how to be direct, polite, and firm when asking a roommate to leave.

The "Different Lifestyles" Approach
Use when: When you just aren’t compatible to live together anymore

"Hey, I wanted to sit down and talk. I think we have really different living styles, and it’s causing stress for both of us. At the end of the lease, I’d like to part ways so we can both find a better living situation."

The "Moving a Partner In" Approach
Use when: When your life circumstances are changing

"Hey, I wanted to give you plenty of notice: [Partner's Name] and I are planning to move in together here when the lease is up in [Month]. I wanted to tell you now so you have plenty of time to find a new place."

The Unpaid Bills Approach
Use when: When they aren’t paying rent on time

"I can't continue covering the rent/bills when they are late. Because of this, I need you to move out by the end of next month. I need a roommate who can reliably split the costs."

The Follow-Up Written Notice
Use when: Sending a text/email after an in-person conversation to create a paper trail

"Just following up on our conversation earlier today—I just want to confirm that you will be moving out of the apartment by [Date]. Let me know if you need help coordinating with the landlord."

The "Friendship First" Approach
Use when: When you want to stay friends but can’t be roommates

"I value our friendship too much to let living together ruin it. I think we'd be much better off as just friends, so I'd like us to find different living situations when the lease is up."

What NOT to Say

Frequently Asked Questions

Should I do this over text or in person?

Always try to have the initial conversation in person, unless you feel unsafe. It prevents misunderstandings. However, always follow up with a text or email so you have the move-out date in writing.

How much notice should I give them?

Ethically (and often legally, depending on your area), you should give at least 30 days notice, but 60 days is much kinder to allow them time to find a new place.

Can I legally kick them out?

It depends on whose name is on the lease. If you are both on the lease, you generally cannot force them out; you have to agree not to renew, or one of you must leave. If you are the master tenant/owner, you have more rights, but must follow local eviction laws.

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